Thursday, February 28, 2013

A short bit about the Oscars.
I don't recall it being so crass and low-brow in past years, but then I haven't watched in a long time.  I'm only passingly interested in the fashion, and feel a gossipy need if some star makes a complete fool of themselves.  Otherwise the Oscars have no attraction for me.  This past Sunday we tried to watch a little, and on several occasions The Man & I looked at each other in askance, "is this really supposed to be funny? for a broad audience?" We both agreed, "No, certainly not."  It sounded like a roast of the actors instead of intelligent wit. Sad and embarrassing to watch.

I did not appreciate having to explain what "boobs" meant to my eldest daughter, because of the one minute they were exposed, and I'm glad that her questioning did not extend past "that man meant, he saw her breasts?"  Because, explaining how or why actresses choose to do nudity in film is not something I'm ready to discuss with a six year old, nor is it something she's mature enough to understand.  The whole presentation, supposedly the pinnacle of the cream of Hollywood talent, was a total disappointment.  I'm glad I haven't wasted any more time watching and do not plan to watch next year.

I have to admit though, They accomplished one goal....everyone seems to be talking about it.  So, good for them, god'll love'em, and happily we'll go on without participating in that fiasco.

p.s. The Superbowl half-time Show was another example of objectification of women...a powerful woman, a one-dimensional performance that I felt sorry for letting The Firstborn watch.

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Day 34
Meditation 10, in the bright beautiful snowy afternoon
Yoga 20
Reading Tolstoy
Outside listening to giggling girls
Chatting with dear friends
Happy homeschooling & housework, little packing prep

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Day 33
Meditation 16, gave in to rest as I was struggling, realized that
forcing anything doesn't help
Hanging with The Firstborn pleasantly
Enjoying beautiful snow, baking, & even housework
So grateful for the good that I,we, are showered with every day, every way.
Reading ITwTI
Catch up journaling a bit

Monday, February 25, 2013

Day 32
Cardio 55 spin bike & walking treadmill
Meditation 30 (so excited to hit the cushion, wonderful respite)
Reading In Tune With the Infinite (Trine)
Few minutes rest, reading Tolstoy, while chicken thawing
Chatting with two favorite friends
Grateful & productive overall
Giggling & playing with The Younger of the Two, enjoying (mostly) The
Elder of the Two's description of her little boy crush and her day at
homeschool connection.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Day 31(Sun,today)
Yoga 20
Reading, some Dispenza & Tolstoy
Meditation & prayer with just a few hundred friends because of weather
Eating all right, probably didn't need that chocolate muffin : )

Day 30 (Sat)
Cardio walking + yoga lite 60 minutes (at the gym no less!)
New blender, so eating is easier for greens,yay gratitude!

Day 29 (Fri)
Plenty of prayer with my parenting, not a moment to spare for myself otherwise
Eating well enough considering it's shopping day
Feeling especially loving & grateful

Friday, February 22, 2013

Field Trip

There's a story we read in our curriculum about 2 sisters, one's heart is cold as stone (Manyara), one is gentle and kind no matter what (Nyasha).  I feel sometimes that I have a Manyara and a Manyara in's heart breaking.  When they beat on each other there are some instances when they'll work it out, this morning was not one.  My solution, per Love & Logic, has been to "uh-oh!  bedroom time for you both (confined to beds)...when you're both calm, and both ready for recovery you may both come down at the same time."  It works fairly well---I've managed to rein in my reactive wade-into-the-fray-and-fix-it impulse.

We are supposed to field trip today to another indoor pool where I'll be comically flush in maternity suit wondering if my skin will survive the chlorine content.  They've run the gamut this morning, sweet, playing, to screaming, to bedroom time, to attitude-terrible, to recovery, to talking, to affimations, and currently working on the only chance they'll have to get to this pool adventure.  At one point in her frustration F actually screamed, "we're NOT GOING!" to which I replied, "really?cool!  Thank goodness, I'm totally happy to stay home today, THANKS!"  Stopped her in her verbal tracks.

Barely clinging to sanity at the moment, but soldiering forth.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

Day 28
Stairs 30 modified pushups & vini yoga 10
Self care ~> Wonderful visit at the dentist, grateful we've a
community to work within, so grateful we can go to the dentist at all!
Meditation 10
Hanging with my husband
RAK Gifted oranges to homeless man, grateful we can share

Day 27
Home day, fairly lazy all around
Gratitude of parenting skills learned, successful love & logicking the firstborn
Grateful for beautiful snow!

Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Day 26 (Today, Tuesday)
up early, eating very well, though not early enough to get my rhythm in before kiddos awake
20 Stair dancing
10 yoga
10 meditation
gratitude,giggles,happy work for LOViNTee

Day 25 (Mon)
purposeful and productive with housework, amidst morning lesson, and prepping for launch to afternoon activities
doc appt for me and ultrasound for baby (all is well, no we don't look for gender)
laughin' in a maternity suit, tolerating overcrowded indoor pool for the sake of my children, random act kindness? possibly.
eating very well except for that blasted sugar drink for the diabetes test---blechk
dropped a note of thanks on our new friend/landlady's door
to sleep early

Day 24 (Sun)
short meditation with 1000 good friends
hangin' out laughing at the church
thoroughly enjoyed a bit of Downton Abbey catch-up
eating well, water good

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Day 23
paused the meditating, why is this?  I'll have to contemplate---that's bullsh*t, I already know.  Usually it's due to a feeling of coming too close to the divine, I get skittish and back away a little...nervous about the brightness and potential, especially when manifestations come firmly into reality, reminds me of this quote:

So, today:
Day 23
Meditation 10
 Cardio 40 walking
Hangin' with Littles, books & blocks
Gratitudes & blessings, a couple of which were simply watching little girls' faces & listening to Papa with them...they have it really good, and i am soso grateful
Creative pursuits, writing here
Journal ing
 Practicing loving Detachment
Chatting with meeting momma

Simply Be Grateful

I've made gratitude lists here several times before (label gratitude).
Seeing this post by Finding Joy I think I'll participate in a blessings of consciousness style.

Soothing music gifted to us by Dear Friend M, Elizabeth Mitchell...aiding currently the explosive reaction by The Firstborn when she made a couple of poor decisions that kept her from shopping with Papa tthis morning...cinnamon bananas that the Second is stubbornly refusing to eat after requesting them....stubborn-ness or better put tenacious aspects of both these children, successful people are determined in some form or other...consequences, no matter how terrible the reaction seems at the moment, the lessons learned now will benefit future decision making, my kids aren't happy all the time because they live in this real world, that's a blessing....Love & Logic that has given me tools to use, helped me better understand my own issues with empathy and love, and lead me into my more authentic parenting style....their little dollars wasted on crap candy, a lesson in and of itself when both girls decided the didn't like the candy....berries are a blessing in every sweet bite...glu-free flour for morning waffles with maple syrup...smarter eating, especially considering my pregnant state....blessing of healthy children, healthy pregnancy, healthy friendships, healthy marriage, healthy harmonious and happy existence....blessing of community relationships thickened in the past 6 years, a sense of belonging is priceless....deeper learning about my own reactions and responses that I can ferret out and understand any ideas of separation, limitation, and fear that linger....
Saturday Daddy day projects with papa...recovery time on the stairs for little blender (the Ninja died).... kale + blueberry + almond milk + greens + protein powder = goodgreengratitudes....but then mixed frozen berries + greens + protein + pomegranate juice = detox wonderful....and 'cause I have to, the choco monkey = dark chocolate almond milk + frozen bananas + peanut butter (+ protein)....

{most of this appears to be about food, well I am pregnant, and it's coming up on lunchtime}

little girls giggling....yogurt smiles...berry "roll-ups" for breakfast, invented by the Firstborn....Rosetta Stone Spanish...toddler voices in the grocery exclaiming "OH, SHELLS!" regarding (pi)'stacios, and asking so sweetly, "mama, can we have deez wittle wed t'ings, puh-wease?" (raspberries)....watching little brains make new connections & myelination....learning to teach is a blessing, making my own new days....situations and circumstances that strengthen us individually and as a husband, lover, provider, funny-man, father, trekker on this adventure....beatrix potter story books....firm parenting resolve....distractions....nonsensical silly tutus first thing in the morning...prioritizing, maturity, love....
creativity, inspiration, and dreams....generousity (receiving and giving)....peanut butter....hummus....chubby little wrists, and marshmallow kicks...pickles, pizza, and & cold running water, indoor plumbing, on-demand heat & cooling, choices of foods to nourish our bodies all blessings.... ability to notice a blessing is, in and of itself, a blessing.

Day 22 (15 Feb Fri)
Too too fun hang out & catch up with library buddy, her boys are almost exact age difference as my girls.
Then wonder of wonders, synchonicity and got to have a late lunch with dear Friend M + crew hang out for burritos, cookies, and berries.
stair climbin' for cardio 15 squeezed in before grocery trips

Thursday, February 14, 2013

LOVEly Day

I made this Hidden Heart Pound Cake.  Got the idea from BoulderLocalvore, too too fun, fairly simple, easy for the Firstborn to aid with assembly.
I found Pamela's Cake mixes at our local Whole Foods, but no Wilton Rose color, nor any Cherry flavoring (or fruit flavoring of any kind in our local "regular" groceries).  Yummy glu-free cake, and red coloring are paramount, so all was well.

The pink pound cake....

then trimming into slices, cookie-cutter into hearts....

...didn't have a third pair of hands experienced enough to photo the actual submerging of heart-stack, was a little surprised to find that cooked cake in cake batter floats... 

...did shoot the enjoyable gooey aftermath.....

completed baking, had to cool for at least an hour...

....was still warm when served.  Many compliments accepted!

Happy Valentine's Day

Day 21
climbing stairs in house 15 + modified pushups (20 total)
rest (been staying up too late, excitement of gratitude has been energizing)
hangin' with My Valentine and many other loving people for potluck lunch
creative baking with The Firstborn, laughing about almost disasters
chatting with dear friend
just simply, incredibly grateful for my health & well being, joy just bubbling up everywhere
blogging : )

Day 20
Gratefully consciously shopping for myself---really.  This past week I recognized that the regular long sleeves I've been stretching over The Belly were no longer working.  So, tripped to Mommy's Merry-Go-Round nearby, then Nordstrom Rack for easy underthings, and finally Target for a very specific seamless under-tank I've found to be indispensable the last two times.  The girls still had slight fevers, though feeling bunches better.  They trooped through it all, including the last stop to grocery for valentine cake items.
Even without meditation & cardio, still a wonderfully gratitude filled day of fun.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Begin the Move Again

Day 3 of home stay due to some smaller person having a fever. So, to review, that's: a cold of some sort between the two of them, a mercifully quick & mild tummy bug, then a really high fever + headache/cough lite congestion for the younger then the elder.  One day they have no fever, then 102+, it's kinda weird.

I am healthy, and grateful for it, rather refusing this bout for myself.  I disinfected the house yesterday.  Every surface within reach of small hands was wiped with my preferred solution, including & not limited to light switches, door jams & counter tops.

More packing done. I can actually be grateful that I'm really good at it, as I've moved more than a dozen times in my life since moving out of childhood home, and efficiency is key.  

Weeks before hand, begin with an area a day. Items in storage, re-organize, consolidate, re-box, and stage. 
In the living spaces, start with knick-knack items, decor, books, and photographs (I've consolidated all the wall photos, etc. to one area for now).
Any clothing in storage (regular clothes in my current case), use [one of many] bags/suitcases to pack ready-to-move.
Rotate to packing items in the kitchen and hobby/play rooms that aren't essential, i.e. craft bins, fabric bins, baking pans, fancy dishes and platters---anything in cabinets that only gets use once a month or less.
Label everything with quality masking tape and sharpie (preferred method).  I've a memory for a lot of things, however, if something is in a box for more than a month I'll question whether it existed at all when I suddenly miss it.

some bins we've had for years
The best part of moving?  Culling through what one doesn't need.  I actually really enjoy and appreciate the process to minimalize belongings.  Things that used to hold such importance, no longer do.  I've honed a skill, the skill of examining items for their worth to me.  
Will this be important by this time next year?  Out of all the art work my girls turn out, which one will I really remember, yield the past pleasure of their little-ness, in 30 years? (and then gauge their interest in keeping it---has it been on the playroom floor for the past 2 months?)  
Have I worn this in the past year?  Will I be able to wear it within a year?  
Is this item worth transporting again?  Is this item worth continued storage?  (something I estimate with the girls' clothing, because anything I gauge worthy to pass on to the younger one must be stored for minimum 2 years before fitting)

Is this item necessary to my happy existence?  Well, no, really none of it is necessary stuff.  These photos, mementos, small objects brought by little hands....necessary? no.  But en-joy-able? yes.  Sentimentality has its place, though, applied to objects, if it ever gets in the way of my Self-Health or those relationships I have with those around me---well, no Thing is worth more than a relationship.

And if one is 7 months pregnant, don't fool around, lifting and moving boxes doesn't really have to be done right now.  Let someone else do it. Really, truly, remember to ask for help.
Day 19
Meditation 20 + prayer
Home day(again) so lots of packing done = exercise for pregnant lady?
It was yesterday.
I am so grateful for the synchronicity of God-the-universe....The
House is in effect!
Disinfecting this home happily
Eating & drinking exceptionally well staving off whatever it is girls contracted
I am healthy, I am well repetitively mantra-ed
Reading for pleasure, Tolstoy's Karenina

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Contact paper + flat promo magnets = meaningful things to keep posted

Monday, February 11, 2013

Day 18
Meditation 17 (difficult this afternoon, no particular reason)
Reaching out with Love to an acquaintance on a more in depth spiritual level
Rest 20
Felt good to get some behind the scenes (basement) organizing & packing done
Active packing, decent enough short workout, shouldn't have been
lifting most likely though
Taking care of business

Home days

hooray finger knitting!
those are blocks from 2 cartons ea.

Due to another bout with decent fever, we are at home, and finding creative things to do. I actually don't mind today, lots to do with cleaning & starting the move-out packing.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

Day 17
Relaxing and feeling The Universe's synchronicity with connections made
Giggling with The Man and my girls
Meeting with friends
Eating well +++ green goodies
meditation 10
reading poetry & anna karenina

Saturday, February 9, 2013

Playing a little catch-up with my CARE FULL 43 diary

Day 16(today) Sat.
big SereniTea party with friends
catch up on blog : )
walking 20 with Miss J

Day 15(2/8) Fri.
meditation 10
yoga 20
volunteering for curriculum sale
hanging and chatting with dear Miss J while grocery shopping, consciously feeling big gratitudes to the women I've been blessed to have in my life, hangin' out this week
shouting and giggling for joy that God-the-universe is AWEsome, and prayer works....we are open to receive exactly what we intended with The House, the situation perfectly suited to our particular financial status

Day 14(2/7) Thurs.
began with prayer
what a gorgeously wonderful day, such a huge difference from the day before, I feel SO much better, thank goodness for afternoon naps!
We hung with friends all day (see Day's Work post) laughing and chatting and eating yummy healthy foods. Gratefully M'n'crew stay around while The Man and I perused the interior of a house we'd already checked out neighborhood.  He gifts me an (actual) book of poetry. Later, girls were wasted tired, bedded down early, I got to hang with Miss M in her Send Out Cards Valentine Brownie Party.
Oh Happy Healthy Days

Day 13(2/6) Wed.
Totally shot through with ichky-ness. Barely conscious it seems (though I've felt worse).
long rest in the afternoon, then trucked Miss Monkey to her gymnastics class and gratefully headed to a meeting, felt better afterward per usual.
Arriving home I opened a SOC box and found inside the sweetest card with brownies from my Indonesian Pen Pal---wow!  too too sweet and fun, and what a supernice surprise.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Not a "Most" Day

Most days I wake with a certain cheerfulness.  Though I haven't succeeded with my ideal schedule yet, it's just as well, I've been able to fit the Care Full things in as needed.  Most days I can wake and begin the day with ease and grace (more so after breakfast).  Most days our rhythm is fairly set, small people are cooperative 'cause our curriculum is pretty fun, simple, the morning lesson moves quickly.

This morning however, I woke with a serious dread to this day.  No particular reason.  I want to sleep for another couple of hours to shake this head-cold experience, I'm not optimistic about the 3yo attitude for the's been brutal the last couple of days.  Monka-Doo has really been testing her boundaries, reminding me of Miss Monkey as she hit Thunderous Threes and I was suddenly in a world of Whiskey-Tango-Foxtrot did I do to deserve this hellion of a child?  Monday I think there was maybe only one, ONE, hour of the entire day when (while awake or present) someone wasn't whining, screaming, fig1hting, or crying.
(see also tantrums label)

The Firstborn has been relatively resistant lately with our curriculum, and I get frustrated with any thought-quip that "well it's supposed to simply flow, if you'd do your prep work earlier or more thoroughly."  My reactive response for the moment, "F-off."  The girls miss each other when one is in homeschool connection, then t'other attends her little school following day. So, this morning they are content to play quietly together going on 2 hours now.  And I'm letting them---so, so, very grateful for the reprieve.  Miss Monkey will have to catch up on her work, as it seems she's uninterested in participating at the movement-song-form-draw level, I feel my recourse is to have her sit and do the work much like institutional school, worksheets and whatnot.  Tomorrow is another day.

I just wish I felt better to get some housework and packing complete.  le sigh.  Getting back on track totally with dieta, and continuing the search for the next house.
:- /

 I am in need of a proper camera, partly for LOViNTee purposes. The last one damaged by small people and has gone walkabout, noticing a total lack of photos, save instagram & phone pics....feelin' kinda sad about this.
Day 12 (day late post)
Not feeling so hot---illness? and incredibly sleepy from my workout in the evening (not the best for my personal rhythm)
afternoon rest, regardless of screaming thrashing E
visiting with good friend as Miss Monkey did her karate

Monday, February 4, 2013

Day 11
Meditation 10
Bike/walk 60
Reading Anna Karenina
Rest 30
Miraculously kept my calm all day even as small people tried and tried again to fluster me
Chatted with dear mama friends
Responsibly paid bills with gratitude

Day 9 & 10
The Man & I were barely functional Day 9, eating last night's desperate-attempt-to-eat-anything-the-only-thing-I-would-dare-stomach cheese pizza for breakfast, then not wanting to eat at all, vaguely coherent for grocery shopping, then had a wicked crave for milkshake and french fries much later, which we ate out as a family...too too fun, and too too silly.
Day 10 was, of course the Harbowl after lovely prayer & meditation with our Mile Hi community....though I bravely ate greens with lunch, then again with my half-bun cheese burger, things still weren't right overall, the Ravens'-purple cupcake didn't really help, but it was fun!
I did get to read some Thoreau and journal before bed. All is well.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Day 8
prayer and meditation mostly impromptu and centered around healing and letting this terrible tummy pass on without much damage
no reading, but plenty of dozing waiting for nausea to pass
home all day caring for children, and myself
gratitudes that this isn't as serious as the last terrible tummy that passed this way, and see t'other post for today as well.


Earlier this week, Miss Monkey started vomiting after a class, the following day she was completely checked out with fever and toilet trips, relegated to the couch watching movies.

Last night the Monka-Doodle began moaning, complaining "my tummy t-aches", shortly after that she walked to my side in the kitchen, took my hand, and popped purple mess all over the tile.  She then proceeded to decorate her bed and blankets in her sleep.

This morning again the Firstborn complains of terrible tummy, the younger has a decent fever, and so they're having saltines, water, and low-cal gatorade for breakfast.

Things to be grateful for in this....
No vomit on the carpet.
No ichky-sicky poop on the carpet, or beds.
Teachable moments re: keeping hands & our selves clean, not sharing utensils, cups, food, etc.
I'm not vomiting. Based on the timeline, if I make it through today and tomorrow without vomiting then I think I will escape it.
Extra clothes, blankets, sheets, in the closets.
A warm house in which to convalesce, and incredibly so, the homescreen such that the Littles might be still and quiet in the perpetual hypnotic state it produces.
A working washer and dryer.
HOT running water in my home.

edited to add:  I didn't escape totally, though I didn't totally re-boot (grateful), I did get a wicked fever, with dehydration, as did The Man