This Year

Last year this time we were beginning the search for another place to live, and preparing to file bankruptcy. This year, we've redefined our finances and successfully, and gratefully, been living abundantly.

This year we moved (again), and made firm decision to live in This House for the forseeable future, we are purchasing, and stretching out into the permanence of our decision. Interestingly this material permanence has produced interior growth and shifts.

This year I succeeded in homeschooling my firstborn into reading and the 4 arithmetic processes, then spring came as did the bouncing baby boy, and lots of learning for the Little-Big sister as well as the Big-Big sister.  It became painfully apparent in the fall that homeschooling wasn't serving her, my energetic resources were stretched too thin. The school we enrolled with has been a serendipitous blessing. Her favorite subjects at holiday break are handwork, eurythmy, and spanish.  Observing her this Christmastime, she's grown immensely, the space created with her attendance to Mountain Phoenix has allowed she and I to travel more parallel than crosswise.  With a whole new community to explore and connect with, she and I have had our work cut out for us---for me especially amidst learning the means and methods of brick-and-mortar school.  And I've mourned the change, still do when I come across some curriculum material.  I've fallen in love with her again, she's really a magnificent little person.  She's lost teeth, gained a new kitten and a couple of hermit crabs, gotten her ears pierced, left gymnastics, learned to knit, started soccer and is excited about volleyball.

This year, Little-Big sister, giggly in the middle, has grown into a character of comedy.  While she does push in her 3 year old way, it's been interesting watching her roll into her role.  With a break from her big sister she's grown into her own person bit by bit, has her own community of friends at MHCEC.  Lovely have been the afternoons driving to the pick up line while The Second-born is giggling herself stupid in the backseat making baby brother laugh.  It appears she's about to step up into the preschool room, quite a bit earlier than I ever considered...based on her verbal skills, her ability to use scissors, and dress herself among many other things.

This year, a beautiful baby arrived, he graced us with his presence late May and has been a complete joy.  It must be stated, boys and girls are different from the start.  As soon as he surpassed the first vague interactions, without coercing, steering, or guiding...boys are different than girls.  He has a different personality of course, but I'm noticing, what I surmise, are basic male v. female differences with development and activity and interest.  I find myself studying all little boys more closely, researching this boy-energy.  He's starting to rock, he creeps a bit, and tummy-spins and rolls about the floor loudly babbling his focus or his frustration. Already he has definite opinions about injustices of mommy needing to eat or potty-break. Gratefully he has innate patience when it's necessary to focus my attention on the ridiculous 3 year-old antics.

This year, The Man and I have succeeded in moving the household, straightening out and recommitting our responsibilities financially, getting comfortable and enjoying our community, disagreeing then agreeing, laughing and loving, redoubling our conscious parenting efforts, gracefully growing forward.  I'm so blessed to have this man as my partner in this adventure.

Happily happily into the new calendar year!

Then it was Done

All that hustle and bustle, for a few hours of mildly raucous unwrapping. The 3yo is much better at this year, the 7yo is an expert, and the baby was grunting excitement and approval at everything that pleased him.

I kept meaning to write about something, anything---there is a list next to my bed---and then I put it off in favor of seasonally necessary activities. Then days and weeks happen in a flash and I'm experiencing a creative blockage without this outlet.  I'm thinking of a new challenge for myself, possibly involving the Season for Nonviolence as we are lately, as parents, making a more unified effort to root out UNconscious parenting (or personal) habits.  More on that later.

We attended Mile Hi's Christmas Service last night, and it was moving as usual since my heart has opened much more in the past 4 years. I'm positively bursting with gratitude that we belong to such an awesome community here in Denver, I wholly love every single person of this Colorado Family.  Sometimes I think I might burst apart at my seams with bliss.

The GiggleSisters were rabid to don their holiday dresses (maybe next year we'll way until the eve of Xmas Eve to gift them). By the time we left service last night their excitement had reached a fever pitch and, while well behaved, they were barely manageable.  As the Spirit of Santa had gotten a jump on the wrapping and prep, there were very few small last minute things to arrange, and a reasonable hour was attended for the "long winter's nap".

I'm finding with our newest expansion that I've fallen deeper in love with our little (bigger) family. I'm perfectly content to hang around with these people I live with, even when they're acting in ridiculous unconscious manner.  I miss my Texas Family somethin' fierce, life keeps happening keeping us from visiting.  Truth be told, at this point, I'm more than aware with FIVE people, it's no small thing to travel and barge into someone's home.  All in good time.

Since my last post I've finished 3 knitting projects, re-set up my LOViNTee Etsy shop,, sent Christmas cards, baked some good stuff (grateful props to The Man for making Christmas dinner, though), made 12 simple gifts to give away, created Christmas magic, all while managing to care-take the household (barely, some days), handle a baby's illness, and keep the children clean, fed, and at their specified appointments....and I've prayed a LOT, and greedily snatched those still, silent moments in between all the DO-ing.  I found the durable thing within, a palpable loving Spirit that I draw upon to keep moving forward.

All is well, we are at peace, and I'm great-full and gratefully moving into the next calendar year.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Gratitude

I told myself I wouldn't stay up late, I said I'd only work on the photo book until 11. Oh, well.  As our holiday is completed and we're back into the fray tomorrow I thought it appropriate to post a gratitude list.

A--Apple-pear-ginger pie that was Awesome
B--Baby Boys Bouncing and humming, and Babysitters
C--Christmas season is here, Cinnamon and Cookies
D--Dining with Dear ones, and Dates stuffed with goat cheese
E--Evergreens, Especially the one soon to grace my home
H--Housework, yes Housework, 'cause it means I have a Home
I--Indigo for it's many shades of jeans
J--Joy, that I have it every day in some form or other
K--Kites that little children make, and Knitting that I now Know how
L--Light, that without it I mightn't could type, but then maybe poorly
M--Moon so bright on crisp clear nights
N--Nonsense and gibberish blurted belligerently
O--Orange zest making cranberries bright
P--People People all around
Q--Queries and Questions from inQuisitive young minds
R--rain
S--Stomach issues, though uncomfortable and stinky, at least I'm slim : /
T--Turkey and the pot pies I've skill to make
U--Underwear, that I have clean pairs to spare
V--Very Vociferous Voices constantly clamoring, I'll miss them one day
W--Water, hot and cold running water indoors
X--Xenophilia
Y--yo-yo's that keep little hands busy
Z--Zoo Lights a holiday treat one night.

Happy happy sleep tonight.

It's been too long. So, I'll begin my catch up with a bit of Halloween, which it amazes me has turned into an incredible endeavor, lasting about a week with all the activities....it's exhausting. I'm so glad Nov 1 came when it did, and doubly so that Miss Monkey didn't have school that day---some smart people there.  There was a nautical theme this year, the new mermaid costume was completed in time, and the Second born was ecstatic to wear the previous purpler version.

We've been regulars at Boo at the Zoo most of the past 6 years, this year was no different. Mermaids of course must ride dolphins or small polar bears.

Baby rode around as an inking octopus, and I've not hunted down the better pics of that costume. After the first outing I had to tweak it a little to make it more realistically shaped.  He wasn't especially enthused about donning the costume, but was out cold in the Ergo every time.  Note: costumes must be durable and ready to wear multiple times, minimum 3 this year (Boo at Zoo, Trunk or Treat, school costume parades, and of course Halloween proper evening)

There were many pumpkins this year as we attended an extra carving party, and of course baby had to have one as well, I think we totaled 7.  

A success all around. : )

I love the way he loves our kids

Toddleator is a big 3 now, she was so excited for her Birthday Brunch restaurant treat, and then upon arrival home there was a gift bag from Ms D.

The Elder of the Two had a great first CARA meet, she cleaned up in fact.  I'm not sure it's exactly fair with her USAG background bringing her into a totally recreational league.  She really enjoyed her success (2nd AA, 1st bar, 1st floor, 6th beam, 3rd vault), and I enjoyed the more relaxed vibe and considerably shortened duration.

I had gorgeous flowers awaiting me both from my parents and my prospective sister-in-law and brother.

little gymnast hornin' in on my pic

And then to top it all off we had gourmet fabulous cupcakes with a bit of ice cream.  A totally successful relaxing weekend.  

blurry, but the only one we're all smiling

My Mother's Day was simple and lovely, some chocolate and strawberries, a picnic and a walk around the park.  Happy Momma.

NOW, let's have a baby!

The BIRTHDays Are Here

I had a lovely, simple birthday.  I got a nice breakfast, home facial, a bit of yoga, meditation, short Morning Lesson with my Big Girl, and off we went to celebrate a fabulous local shop's first birthday as well.  Though I spent too much time perusing the supplies we made it to my OB appointment then spent the afternoon with dear friends, Lucky Pie pizza, and Sweet Cow Ice Cream.  Back on our side of town we met for lite grocery shopping and a quick meal pick-up.  The girls were so wasted and belligerent with lack of rest (most especially the Younger of The Two) it was a sad comedy getting them fed and sacked out.  

The Elder of The Two then had her birthday celebration the following day, with a Kenpo sparring workshop, trips to the Lego and comic book stores, then a Rockin' Kitchen and ice cream get together at Scrumptious.  An unintended bonus is that her birthday is May the Fourth Be With You, so, many Star Wars perks were had.  

The weekend hasn't been without challenges here and there, nothing that Love & Logic skills couldn't handle.  In trying to keep it simple we overlooked a couple of things that were pretty important to Miss Monkey, namely singing the Birthday Song and blowing out candles.  We're still rookies in a certain sense when it comes to her, it's rather difficult to keep up with her expectations discerning which are truly important and which are red herrings.  As it turned out, those two items were non-negotiable, though everything else she listed about her day as not ideal weren't necessary.

Next weekend the Younger will have her birthday slightly occluded by her elder sister's first CARA gymnastics meet, otherwise it's business as usual.  I am starting to feel some real pressure to have certain items on hand before relaxing into the birthing process---like peanut butter, toilet paper, and frozen foods.  I am so ready to have this babe in arms rather than pummeling my innards, causing physical discomfort and effectively handicapping me.  Ideally, I'd like to have the entire house in proper order, but I'm realistic.  I've already wiped down a majority of the house as we moved in, no worries there.  Getting other things ready, however, has been a challenge as I feel I can't do anything until, but then there are To-Do's that must be done before.  I need a place for baby to sleep (when not with us in bed), a few items for the baby to wear, and a couple of swaddling blankets. The diapers are all collected and clean, ready to use.  Though I have to figure out a mattress and bedding for it, the crib is in house.  For myself, I'd like my sling, nursing cover, nursing bra or two, and an UnderCover Mama.....and maybe one or two other things that will come up as needs inevitably do.  

So it goes, so it beautifully goes.  I am so blessed, I am so grateful.

LOVEly Day

I made this Hidden Heart Pound Cake.  Got the idea from BoulderLocalvore, too too fun, fairly simple, easy for the Firstborn to aid with assembly.

I found Pamela's Cake mixes at our local Whole Foods, but no Wilton Rose color, nor any Cherry flavoring (or fruit flavoring of any kind in our local "regular" groceries).  Yummy glu-free cake, and red coloring are paramount, so all was well.

The pink pound cake....

then trimming into slices, cookie-cutter into hearts....

...didn't have a third pair of hands experienced enough to photo the actual submerging of heart-stack, was a little surprised to find that cooked cake in cake batter floats... 

...did shoot the enjoyable gooey aftermath.....

completed baking, had to cool for at least an hour...

....was still warm when served.  Many compliments accepted!

Happy Valentine's Day

Simple Christmastime

Christmas with photos.

The making of the popcorn & cranberry strand (The Man's first time)...

A surprise gift from Grandma, an evening to the Nutcracker for Momma & Firstborn Daughter...

 BONUS photo with a ballerina!

LOViNTee Packages to be delivered....

Family Christmas at Mile Hi after a stellar performance we had cookies & cider while waiting to visit with Kris Kringle himself.

The Eldest Daughter explaining and directing...

The youngest absorbing the ambiance...

The dads hangin' around procuring refreshment for moms waiting in the line...and enjoying more than a few themselves....

Happy little friends....

Finally!  The chat with Mr. Kringle himself, and hand delivery of her Letter to Santa...

While little sister keeps a safe distance, content with a cheerful smile and a wave....

Pictures with every...

Single...

Character...

Some well deserved Christmastime snow, that has hung around for days & days with appropriately chilly winter weather...

 Christmas morning joy as Mr. Kringle delivered even late, hastily emailed, requests....

Oh, the anticipation, the enthusiasm!

Thanks to grandma, there is some play make-up for Miss Monkey to enjoy...

We are surrounded by blessings of family & friends, healthy, happy, holiday together---couldn't ask for more I think.  Going forward to the new calendar year the blessings have only just begun!

Christmas Meaning

From our Christmas Mindfulness Questions
Day 1: What does Christmas really mean to me?

Truly before I had a baby it meant more about gifting and generosity than spiritually.  Now that I have personal understanding of the miraculous gift of life and consciousness Christmas takes on new meaning for me.  Especially since we have such a wonderful spiritual community to share it all with the whole season has snapped into a new dimension.  I still get a big charge from gifting to friends and family, I love surprising someone with a gift that has been brewing in my mind for months.  I adore shopping for Toys for Tots drives,  and the Angel Trees.  It's so fun to model generosity, to get excited, and keep the "gimmees" away.  This year, without means, I had to surrender any expectation of what I might purchase, work with The Man about how much/when/what we would purchase (practicing Unity of Purpose)---I couldn't plan a thing, surrendering totally on yet another level.  Would that I had infinite supply at my disposal in the form of money all the time and I might try and gift everyone all year long.  I want to do more, I always have wanted to do more, be of service in a bigger way.  Fortunately I recognize the power of the Spoken Word (b.k.a. prayer) and I do have an infinite immediate supply of prayerful abundance words for the world. (got a thrill of joyful goosebumps just now)

I know the history of Christmas celebration, the cobbling together of all the pagan/christian/roman/nordic symbolism that has become what we covet today, and I bring it lightly into conversation with my kiddos so they'll understand the history and significance rather than doggedly following without understanding.  I really appreciate and identify with the symbolism of re-birth of Christ Consciousness, our highest self, newly created, newly arrived, completely un-spoilt, beautiful, brilliant and wondrous---the way we all are when we first arrive here.  That's what "keeping Christmas well" throughout the year means to me, embodying that loving, compassionate, high consciousness every day of the year.  We don't have to let the outside material world determine the inside, we can reclaim this newly birthed beauty every moment, every day by simply getting still and Knowing the I AM is within always and all ways.

Happy Christmas!

: )   A

Letting Go

From our 12 days of Christmas Mindfulness Questions:

Day 4: What from the past year do I need to let go of?

The financial mistakes we've made---and I release them with joy and gratitude for lessons learned, looking forward to working within our means for the future.

After more than 2 years of trying to fix it-fix it-fix it NOW, and effectively martyring ourselves on the debt we owed we finally admitted we were powerless over our situation, what we’d been trying hadn’t worked, the situation was truly unmanageable.  Then we came to believe that we needed Higher Guidance, prayerfully made a decision to turn the solution and outcome over to God.  We’ve taken an extensive inventory of our debtors, and of our property, which when written out was horrifically out of balance. I gratefully realized we’ve been living pretty darn responsibly, having bought nothing new that we couldn’t find used or cheaper for several years now.  We’ve sat with The Lawyer and confessed all our shortcomings, signed all the paperwork, and asked that the shortcomings be reorganized, and relieved (b.k.a. Chapter 13).  Our amends will be in the form of payments to a trustee over the next years, additionally, continued living amends to our financial relationship, and our relationship with each other in regards to finances.  Going forward we’ll seek to understand what we need, to make an abundance plan (b.k.a. budget), and prayerfully & meditatively act within our means.  

Happy days ahead, debt free!

: )  A

p.s. I confess it feels incredible to know that gifts this year are paid for in full already, there will be no haunting of Christmas Past for 2013.

Great Thanks Given

To our quietly simple Thanksgiving holiday (that I kept meaning to post about).
Thanks given all around, it was too fun reveling in the sweetness of talkative and excited little girls at our small overflowing table.  It was a blessing and we are blessed.

Many topics to address as much has happened, I know I'll get on this eventually, what with new pregnancy it seems even small things are pretty tiring lately.

Happy, joyful, free.
A

Balloting

Yay!  there will be a 4 year respite from political ads after today (lovely battleground state).  Hopefully people will go back to loving their neighbors and being kind and thoughtful to each other without the constant barrage of negativity from varying parties vying for one's votes.

So, I voted, no I didn't get a sticker.  I can only say, "meh".  I did it 'cause I honor the women that fought for my right to vote, and I have daughters that need to understand the process and the community responsibility of  [presumed] representation.  So that's what we did for morning lesson today.  But otherwise, I am disillusioned about the whole process, sad about the divisive nature it causes in our country, and though I vote I already know that the more things change the more things stay the same.  Seen The Campaign or The Other Guys ?  Both poke "fun" at the reality of the system we've in place.

What would happen if no one voted?  would the electoral college then dissipate and the office remain unfilled? What persons comprise the electoral college?  Here is what came up.

"Electors are often chosen to recognize service and dedication to their political party. They may be State-elected officials, party leaders, or persons who have a personal or political affiliation with the Presidential candidate."


And this is disturbing a bit for me:

"There is no Constitutional provision or Federal law that requires Electors to vote according to the results of the popular vote in their States. Some States, however, require Electors to cast their votes according to the popular vote. These pledges fall into two categories—Electors bound by State law and those bound by pledges to political parties."

That is all.  Happy mid-week!

A

Our Hallow's Eve

There was another meet, a Halloween Party, trunk or treat for the homeschool connection, another Halloween party for Toddleator E at her little school, then carving pumpkins squeezed in, and finally tonight the real trick or treating happens and we're spent.  How on earth did Halloween get to be such a crazy busy holiday?  It's not even a "real" holiday either, meaning not a bank holiday.  Though I have to say the day was  really nice.  Wednesday are our total home day, we don't have to get up to be anywhere, it's a beautiful fall day.  I made killer pumpkin waffles with cinnamon syrup (which, now that I think on it, The Man may have tossed the remainder--booo).

Masks on, costumes donned we headed out and about our community to Threaten Tricks unless Treated.  People were very generous as it seems there weren't many kids out, Miss Monkey's bucket was full and Monka-doodle's sack was weighing her arm and slowing the toddler speed down another notch.

A fun and happy occasion for all.

There are ALL the pumpkins carved for the occasion, 2 extra from a party.

What you see here is a nice healthy smoothie "enhanced" with Hallow's Eve candy.  : /

And now, bulleting into November, fall is a season for change and many changes are occurring.  I'll have more on that later I think.  For now, I'm grateful and joyful, for we are so blessed.

Halloween Gym

It happened this weekend I volunteered a Halloween party for the gymnastics gym.  I was a Floor Monitor, keeping small boys from using found weapons or spreading the pit foam about, quipping loud "hands to yourself!" when needed and dashing little hopes at injury by forbidding the p(arallel)-bars & beams.

The boys ran around in packs playing what appeared to be tag-em or shoot-em games.  The girls tried lots of tricks they aren't allowed to during classes and smaller knots of them grew and dispersed randomly.  There was a haunted house that sounded exactly like something I do not want my 6 yo in (maybe in a few more years).   Mostly older grade school and early high school kids, predominantly female.  Which made it easier to explain to F why she didn't need to be there (not to mention the multiple other activities for the weekend).

At some point booster moms walked about with bowls of candy causing screeching and clamoring.  There were handstand contests (won by the elites of course), limbo contests, and costume contests.  About 20 minutes after the candy handouts the activity reached a frenzied fever pitch of manic proportions and shortly after that I noticed kiddos surreptitiously dealing candy out to kids that didn't have anymore.

Candy, sugar actually, is like crack for kids as we well know.  I've noticed distinctly that right before the sugar crash happens they always go searching for more.  After 2 solid hours of phrenetic activity and sugar consumption, they were all sent home to sleep it off.

Always an adventure.

: )

Ransom Box Update

Hooray for the newest mechanism of empowering my kiddos to take care of their things and make contributions to the household!  I *heart* the Ransom Box!
Miss Marvelous Monkey chose to do SEVEN ransoms t'other day.  Included wiping baseboards, 10 hugs n' kisses for Mama saying "Only Turkeys leave their toys out," wiping inside of vehicle, reading quietly for 15 minutes in her room, cleaning windows/mirrors upstairs, and a couple others.  It's easier and more fun when my reaction to her ransom demand is smiling dramatic incredulity, "What?  that's not fair!  you always pull things you like to do!"  She completed them all in reasonable time and chose 7 items out of the box to replace in our newly organized play/craft room.

Even Toddleator E is in on the game, though she struggles a little with the requirement of doing something in order to get what she wants from the box.  Of course in her case I might modify the demand, making it somewhat simpler.  The last slip she drew was yelling "I love my mama, she takes care of me!" 10 5 times.

This weekend I will prep for starting our first month of home's-cool, and The Man and I will celebrate a little for our 9th anniversary.  Happy holiday weekend!
: )

Grateful for Freedom of...

As I've done before, my gratitude lists are easy alphabets, this one has a theme for the holiday, enjoy.

Today, 4th of July, I am Grateful for my Freedom of....

Attitude--one small change in perception can change a lot more that one might think
Beneficence--who and how is all our choice
Courage--what to use it for and when
Decision--from small daily decisions to the larger more complex
Experiments--because that's what life is, a series of experiments, the more we make the more we learn
Faith
Goods to choose from--we have incredible variety here, the bounty that we have incomparable to other countries
Home & Happiness--our pursuits really amount to a need for belonging, a home in classic sense or esoteric, and the happiness we find therein
Intellect--choose to use it, grow it, or not
Joy--comes from within, cultivate it!
Knowing--that inner deep kind
Love
Matrimony--bureaucracy of any kind shouldn't be involved with intensely personal affairs
New learning--because dynamic learning is the key to growth, the opposite of stagnation
Opinion--everyone has one
Patriotism--I get to decide what it is for me
Query--ask questions, lots and lots of questions
Reading--our beautiful library system and the newest fun of anythink
Speech--because everyone simply wants to be heard, the question is: are you willing to give a gift of listening?
Truth--know your own, and speak it like cannonballs!
Understanding--another gift to give
Vision--I have mine, what's yours?
Xenophilia--we can no longer be islands unto ourselves...get some worldly experience
Yelling--it seems to me that it doesn't work, but people still try (see above: Speech)
Zero regrets--regret is useless, serves only to squash my learning experience

I know I could have posted this yesterday, but a cheeseburger coma overtook me.  A lovely day with nottathing to do is always nap inducing.

Happy Independence Day!

2 on a Tricycle!

Oh HAPPY DAY (yesterday)!  Toddleator E was born....and now she's big enough for a trike, she uses the potty very consistently, she's verbose and silly and cuddley, always ready to try something that looks like fun (especially if Sissy has done it).  At the Downtown Aquarium she jumped up and down and squealed through the exhibits pointing out all the "BIG FISH!"

We are so blessed, and we are so very very grateful!

Boasting of Birthdays

Progress of the My Big 6.  Miss Monkey practices her bike a bit.  I see her balance well, then appears to be so excited she's doing it, she wobbles a tiny bit and jumps off.  She tries again a few times, then decides to call it a day on the bike.  She's reading, for real, sounding out words and reading!  It is thrilling.  I think about how the world is just opening up for her, reading is the first step on so many adventures.  No loose teeth yet, although she's incredibly excited for her turn to put something out for the tooth fairy. (yes, we do believe in magic in this house).

She was beside herself with excitement about her mani-pedi party with her little friends.  All day she was compliant and [mostly] pleasant in helping with everything that needed to be done to prep for the event.  I indicated to her what needed to be done, gave her the choice of what order to do it in, and reminded her that if she needed a break to g'head and take one for a bit, then move on.  I didn't feel I had to remind her much at all---> *joy*!  

There were 2 friends that joined us for manis & pedis, they were stellar.  Bemused with the personalities involved, I mostly observed the dynamic unless it edged on mean-spirited.  They squealed and giggled the entire evening, watched some of a movie, then bedded down and passed summarily out.

A complete success, with grace and ease!

My Birthday, which was the day before, was a gloriously packed day with friends and errands, ending with PF Chang's and 14 Hands.  Happy to start the next year getting more grateful, more loving, and more successful with every thing and in every way!